What are most people tired of? Others saying how tired they are.

Do you — or people around you — claim to be tired all the time? You maybe working extra hard — harder than everyone else . . . or you may be full of shit. That’s the message in this article by Greg Williams, titled “Being Tired is Not a Status Symbol”.

Showing how overworked you are can become a nasty piece of self-display: a way of telling others that you’re too important to have a moment to yourself for rest; that the place would fall down without your constant and oh-so-essential ministrations. This kind of tiredness is a not very subtle way of tooting your own horn, which makes it a bore to everyone else — especially if they are all genuinely tired.

Assholes used to pretend they could take anything thrown at them and still show no signs of wear and tear. Now, it seems, the fashion is for these types to mop their brows, sigh heavily, and ‘candidly’ admit to being totally exhausted.

Asking someone how they are is a simple piece of social lubrication: an acknowledgment of the other person’s presence and your acquaintanceship. You don’t expect a detailed answer. That isn’t how it is getting to be, it seems:

There was a time not so long ago . . . when you asked a colleague how he was doing he’d likely reply, “I’m good, thanks.” He might not actually have been good at all, but he would have kept that to himself.
     Now, in the age of the mortgage meltdown and mass layoffs, he’ll probably offer the answer that’s become the default comeback for white-collar guys who want to demonstrate they’ve got it all— the career on an upward curve, the remodeled townhouse, the hot wife, and the privately educated kids. He’ll say, “I’m so tired.”

If this is true, the only rational response is to ask what he’s doing about it, expecting to hear that he’s about to take a long vacation, change jobs, or at least get some medical help for insomnia.

I suspect that isn’t what you’re high-flier expects you to ask. He’s just ’strategically tired’ — tired of demonstrating how many hours he puts in to make the rest of you look idle by comparison; tired of displaying his importance to anyone who will listen. Being publicly exhausted is also a great way to get your excuses for failing to meet your goals in first. Who could expect such an overwhelmed individual to do better.

In my experience, those who work hardest and accomplish most rarely admit to being tired. They don’t need to make a display, and they don’t waste their time telling themselves — and everyone else — how hard they work. They just get on with it.

So please give the rest of us a break. If you’re genuinely tired, your friends will know and help where they can. If you’re just making a fuss to draw attention to yourself, stop right now.

We’re all tired of it.

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